Control.

Just like the sun over the mountain top
You know I’ll always come again
You know I love to spend my morning time
Like sunlight dancing on your skin
I’ve never gone so wrong as to telling lies to you
What you’ve seen is what I’ve been
There is nothing I could hide from you
You see me better than I can
Out on the road that lies before me now
There are some turns where I will spin
I only hope that you can hold me now
Till I can gain control again

Like a lighthouse you must stand alone
Landmark the sailor’s journeys end
No matter what sea I’ve have been sailing on
I’ll always roll this way again
Out on the road that lies before me now
There are some turns where I will spin
I only hope that you can hold me now
Till I can gain control again

Logic.

Chuang Tzu and Huih Tzu were crossing The Hao river by strolling over a dam built across it.

Chuang said
“See how the free the fishes leap and dart,
that is their happiness.”

Hui replied
“Since you are not a fish,
how do you know what makes fishes happy?”

Chuang said
“Since you are not I,
how can you possibly know that I do not know what makes fishes happy?”

Hui argued
” If I, not being you, cannot know what you know,
It follows that you not being a fish cannot know what they know.”

Chuang said
“Wait a minute!
Let us get back to the original question.
What you asked me was
‘How do you know what makes fishes happy?
From the term of your question you evidently know
that I know what makes fishes happy.”

“I know the joy of fishes in the river
Through my own joy as I walk along the bank.”

Pessoptimism.

“An optimist stays up to see the New Year . A pessimist waits to make sure the old one leaves.”
~ Bill Vaughn.

In that case, I am constrained to invent a new word – Pessoptimism to describe my present condition.

Because, I stay up for both nowadays. I just have to replace the word Year with Situation. The pessimist in me has to win as a precondition for the optimist in me to come alive.

Weekly Gratitude List – April 21, 2012.

Saturday was uneventful till late evening when the medical reports were delivered to the doctor. Further tests and reports have been asked for which can only be obtained on Monday and I booked an early morning appointment for Monday. My father needed a lot of comforting however about the need for further tests and what they are likely to throw up. I was able to handle that reasonably well.

Manjiri brought a delightfully enterprising gadget for the home about which you can read here.

Sunday was bliss. Mangal came back and immediately took charge. I had a nice meal cooked by her, shut my self off in air-conditioned comfort and had the most blissful siesta of the last few weeks. The two other Rajgopauls were spared the agony of eating my cooking.

On Monday, I was very pleased to be able to drive my father to the diagnostic center in the morning and back and again to the doctors with the reports later in the evening. All systems are clear bar age related minor problems which will be tackled.

Tuesday was relatively peaceful bar a malfunctioning ATM machine. It finally worked and I was able to withdraw some cash for daily expenses. I was also able to go out shopping and to the park for a while after all the troubles of the previous two days.

While shopping I found some delicious looking button mushrooms and the last of the fresh green peas on Tuesday and on Wednesday, I cooked Dhingree Mutter in a rich gravy, which was much appreciated by the Senior and the Junior.

The cardiologist and the Physician visited to examine my father and once again have given a clean chit for everything except a sluggish kidney for which, they gave an injection and have asked for some additional tests. He will have to be given ten of that injection twice weekly and he should be able to improve his immunity levels and general stamina.

At the request of Meeta, I conducted a training program for FW staff which was most satisfying.

On Thursday a technician from the Diagnostic Center came home and took a blood sample. The results clearly indicates that my father had Chronic Kidney dysfunction and has been referred to a Nephrologist. The consultation is most likely to be the coming Monday. It took some major effort to calm him down and to make him understand that there is no emergency and the chances of dialysis is remote as it was in the initial stages.

On Friday I took my father again to the cardiologist and the physician who saw all the reports and insisted that he be seen by a nephrologist. I was able to contact the nephrologist on the phone and fix an appointment for Saturday.

The Rose Bud.

I have recently been going through quite a harrowing time with my care giving duties with a suffering, and therefore difficult 95 year old man, my father. One development after the other has been taking place and as I write this, the end of the tunnel is nowhere in sight.

It is in that frame of mind that I received this email from a well wisher. It has come at the right time and has acted as a balm and given me a fresh dose of energy and enthusiasm to continue with my care giving activities.

Instead of complaining that the rosebush is full of
thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses.
~ German Proverb

God’s Rosebud

A new minister was walking with an older,
more seasoned minister in the garden one
day.

Feeling a bit insecure about what God had
for him to do, he was asking the older
preacher for some advice.

The older preacher walked up to a
rosebush and handed the young preacher
a rosebud and told him to open it without
tearing off any petals.

The young preacher looked in disbelief at
the older preacher and was trying to figure
out what a rosebud could possibly have to
do with his wanting to know the will of
God for his life and ministry.

But because of his great respect for the
older preacher, he proceeded to try to
unfold the rose, while keeping every petal
intact.

It wasn’t long before he realized how
impossible this was to do.

Noticing the younger preacher’s inability
to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the
older preacher began to recite the following
poem…

“It is only a tiny rosebud,
A flower of God’s design;
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.”

“The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
GOD opens this flower so easily,
But in my hands they die.”

“If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
This flower of God’s design,
Then how can I have the wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?”

“So I’ll trust in God for leading
Each moment of my day.
I will look to God for guidance
In each step along the way.”

“The path that lies before me,
Only my Lord and Savior knows.
I’ll trust God to unfold the moments,
Just as He unfolds the rose.”

Dance.

Welcome to the Friday Loose Bloggers Consortium where twelve of us write on the same topic. Today’s topic has been chosen by Will. The ten other bloggers who write regularly are, in alphabetical order, Delirious, gaelikaa, Grannymar, Magpie, Maria SF, ocdwriter, Padmum, Paul, Rohit, The Old Fossil and Will. Do drop in on their blogs and see what their take is on this week’s topic. Since some of them may post late, do give some allowance for that too!