From the Washington Post Style Invitational, in which it was postulated that English has male and female nouns, and readers were asked to assign a gender to nouns of their choice and to explain their reason.
Some of the best submissions:
Detective Novel — F. because it keeps you wondering what comes up next ! .
Swiss Army Knife — M. because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.
Kidneys — F. because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.
Penlight — M. because it can be turned on very easily, but isn’t very bright.
Hammer — M. because it hasn’t evolved much over the last 5,000 years but it’s handy to have around .
Tyre — M. because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.
Hot air balloon — M. because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it. And, of course, there’s a lot of hot air !
Shoe — M. because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.
Copier –F. because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Also it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed but it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.
Ziploc bags — M. because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them !
Critic — F. What, this needs to be explained?!!!
Hourglass — F. because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom. 😀😀