This is the question that my co-blogger Shackman asks for this week’s 2 on 1 Friday blog post. Please do go over to his blog . T to see what he has to say on the topic. Thank you.
My answer is very simple.
Neither.
I would prefer to be accepted as I am, as I accept almost all those who cross my path.
Left my calling card over at Shackman’s a few minutes ago. You two really got my grey matter going this fine Friday morning.
Your “neither” answer is compelling and, to the extent I understand meditation, maybe the one we should work towards. Its sentiment however, patently, not true. Both being liked and respected are important to humans – depending on temperament to varying degrees. However, and you wouldn’t be Ramana if you didn’t dodge the question’s curve ball, you just ask for “Acceptance”. Indeed. But what is acceptance? Being tolerated? Like a mangy dog under your feet you don’t have the heart to send packing? Or accepted warts and all – like the resident eccentric who has a “get out of prison” free card? Or are asking for that acceptance which is someone else just being resigned to your existence in their lives?
I’ll go away now and make some delicious concoction in the kitchen because that is what I do (other than going for walks) when I need to think something over.
U
If you meditate long enough you will reach that stage of equanimity.
It depends…yes I’ve not used that phrase for quite some time…
Nor I.
I think us humans thrive on emotions, whether hate or love or all in between. Acceptance I would apply to situations mainly. It is a nothing word when it comes to human but would contribute to how I operate succcessfully in the world.
If I accept you, which I undoubtedly would as I do with most humans, it doesn’t mean anything, does it? It would only be human of you to desire something extra, a like, love, praise, delight, etc.
Just being accepted would be kinda lonely, yanno?
XO
WWW
The idea in wanting to be accepted as one is to achieve a state of equanimity where it does not matter what others think of one.
For me, it depends on the situation. There are times when I’m acting in a position of authority or as an expert, and then it’s more important that I’m respected. But otherwise, I like people liking me. It feels good. And I think it’s a human think to enjoy that.
You are still a working professional and I can understand. My take is simply to reach that stage where it does not matter for one’s wellbeing whether one is respected or liked.
I would ideally be both liked and respected. If you respect someone without liking them, that suggests you only respect them because they’re intimidating in some way. If you like them without respecting them, that suggests you overlook all sorts of bad behaviour just because they’re fun to be with. So yep, both liking and respect please.
I can understand and see how it is apt for you.